trueyouandmixemotions

For the past weeks that I’ve experienced from hatred, depression, and unbelieve, I had concluded to close the “door” to that person and open another “door”. From the past door, at first, I had experienced happiness, delight, and contentment. As time goes by, bitterness and jealous overcomes us. That door decided to close his door to me and search another one that will fulfill his qualifications to him. Innocently, his door in my heart still opened, waiting to return and apologize for what he have done. Stupidity make me believe that he will come back and accept me again. It’s been so nice for him that he make me believe that he still love me, but not. 

As soon the courage comes to me and face his quo, I honestly confessed my love to him, my undying love, but, he insisted my confession. He just ignored my words of bravery and told me to wake up! My heart really explode to what I have just heard from his devilish mouth. My eyes started to pour down tears to my pinkish cheeks and can’t believe that he will say that words to me. I called out all of my friends to help me out from this problem. There are such quotations that made me inspire like:

“Don’t close the door if you still love that person, if not, close it permanently.”,

“If you still love the past, it’s not a reasonable reason to open another door unless the other door from the past is now closed.”,

“You can’t cross the two lakes at the same time.”

As for that moment, another door is waiting to be opened, it is knocking too loud. I hurriedly opened that door and welcomed that person. We get to know each other, open such topics bout work, school, family, and relationships. This person suddenly confessed love to me and I try to see if this person will never make me so stupid unlike to my past. I want to have a happy, healthy, and vibrant relationship.

But here again, the past door is breaking the chains into pieces, trying to enter again and buzz my happy life with my hubby. I don’t want this person destroy our relationship just because of me. But, one question: Can I secretly love the past,  just for strength and friendship, even though I have my new one now?

Please respond immediately…..

Need advices

Manila - Philippine’s capital and largest city in the country. Where the dreams of every Filipino, opportunities overflow, destiny of the youth, and the different cultures are found all here only at Manila. Smiles and frowns, delight and sorrow, upper and below people are some people’s feelings.

Manila is famous for its high rise buildings, busy streets, honking of vehicles, parties, gigs, geographical topography, landmarks, world renouned schools, and universities and for the palace where the president lives.

Behind these positive things about Manila, poverty is still shown, even at our own government, the discrimination amongthe lesser people around the metro, the upliftment of prostitution among the youth, graft and corruption, and luxury life of people that embarked to each minds of Filipinos.

As I was strolling at the Roxas Boulevard, I saw almost on what’s happening in the country: sleeping in the street, begging for alms, fishing and swimming at the salty but smelly sea side, selling cold desserts, pearls, and american vintage coins (available at US Embassy?). In a single minute, a beggar came into us and he would like to share his “biko” to us. But my mother insisted to accept the invitation. Instead, she gave in a cup of water and she stare to him like she’s disgusted.

Let’s get in focus, if I will be the next mayor of Manila City, I will restore everything from culture, fashion, lifestyle, schools, curfew hours. People who are living in the streets, will be given housing plans, jobs and right to study for their children. Cultural shows must be done every week so that we can feel and show to our other Filipino people that our culture must not fade to black, it must be uplift more and more until we reach the highest peak.

But before that to happend, here I am, studying…

I want to share to you my classmate’s poem… He made it right just after the graduation but he posted it this afternoon… Many gave comments to him and they liked it. For me, he will be the next MOST PROMISING JUNIOR POETER…

“Now that Highschool is Finally Over”

Now that highschool is finally over

And in our caps, we pulled down the ‘lever’

I hope nobody is a repeater

Because we already defeated this ‘challenger’

Now that highschool is finally over

Ushng all guts, courage, and faithful prayer

Going to college is no small matter

Because we need to push our limits a little higher

Now that highschool is finally over

I hope everyone is now a believer

For He will not lead us on any danger

Because He’s our only lifesaver

Now that highschool is finally over

I hope nobody here is feeling bitter

Even me, your beloved speaker

Hoped and wished it would last forever.

Congratulations!

Today is the day that you have waited for. The day wherein you can get the fruit of your labor and receive the reward of all hardships that you have done, but I want you to remember that this is not the end, but just the beginning of your journey going to your dreams.

After this day, you will step on the next level of your journey. Hold on to the instructions of God has given. You may encounter trials and obstacles while you are on your journey so you have to stand firm. Do not compromise. Do not let the youth of this world influence you but rather influence them by the truth and good values that you have learned from God’s Word, from your Alma Mater and at home. Always buy the truth, do not sell it, and get discipline, wisdom and understanding.

Let God and your parents be your inspiration while pursuing to reach your goal. Always remember that you are a treasure from heaven and what God has plan for you to lead, to prosper and to have a good future. Let the plan of God in you be clear so that you will not be confused about God’s purpose in your life. But rest assure that you can do all things through Christ who strengthens us and you will receive all the things you will desire if you will seek first His Kingdom.

When yime comes that you have fought the good fight and finished the race, learn to look back and acknowledge those people who help you to reach your goal and help you to make your dreams possible like your parents, teachers, and your Alma Mater. Though you work hard for it, the truth is you cannot accomplish your goal without the help of God and without their help. Bear it in your mind, God Bless us to bless others too.

Let humbleness always live in your heart. Do not boast in anyway and in any reason for the Lord lifted up those who humble themselves before Him. I wish you all the best and looking forward to see you as a future leader. God Bless you.

As a graduate of Emmanuel Christian School, I am proud to say that, I am a proud Emmanuelian. Being an Emmanuelian is the most memorable experience in a students life who studies in ECS. Many had said that in this school, teachers will bombarded you to everyday assignments, the rules will make you unmovable, the voice of the directress will make your feet step backward and starts to run. But they are wrong, being an Emmanuelian, the teachers will treat you as their own, the rules will make your dreams in just a snap away, and the directress will guide you to the righteousness.

As a former Emmanuelian, we are going to go out now to this “well-loved by many people” institution. We will miss our advisers, our classmates, batchmates, lower levels, the school, everything. As this graduation tells us that, we’ve done it, but still, the pain and happiness will remain ini this institution.

In our graduation rite, everything gone better than the past graduations because our batch will be the first to use the new sanctuary (the new WISDOM Church). We are so delighted that after many months that this new sanctuary was constructed by small but hard-working hand, at last its already finish. The rite was started at 5.00 pm sharp and the first performers are the church dancers dancing the song in the book of revelation that goes like, “Father Almighty who will reign forever”. Then the entrance of the Phlippine Flag, Emmanuelian Flag, the Flags of Jesus Christ and Holy Spirit, followed by the entrance of the teachers ans staff. Then the entrance of the Colors of Sections of Fourth Year with their respective advisers. At this moment, we didn’t imagine that our well-loved adviser, Ms, Amabel Rivera, attend to this said event for our sake. We trully missed her for at least 7 months. Each section presents their own banner with each names of their section in it.

Then a Worship Dance was the opening number for the rite made by sectios Job and Habakkuk. After the performance, the opening of Pledges, from the Panatang Makabayan (Pledge to our Country), Pledge to the Holy Bible, and Pledge to the Christian Flag. Then the Confirmation of the Graduates lead by our Principal, Mr. Rogelio Galang and by the president of ECS, Rev. Dr. Pastor Renato Ilmedo. We are so delighted that we are called now gratuates for we completed succesfully the requirements needed. Then our guest speaker, Rev. Dr. Pastor Eli Javier, spake to us about education and some outside matters. He told us to save for our future so that we can contribute our knowledge to the country. He opened a video bout a person who doesnt have 4 limbs but, he is a pastor in their town. No one from us graduates imagine that kind of person. Having informalities in his body, still he gave his life to God.

The distribution of diplomas is next, as we are receiving our diplomas in frame, there is a slideshow about our selves and what we will be in the future. But the slideshow is bit clumsy and sometimes got hanged or wrong. All went done.

The section Proverbs present a interpretive dance bout a father and a son. After that, the presentation of special awards. Many got these mouth-watering awards ever since this institution was stood. First is the Leadership award, wherein students who show sportsmanship, being a leader and leading the students into righteousness. Followed by the Best in conduct - students who show orderliness in the classroom. Thirdly is the Best in Computer award - who showed the deportment in advancements of technology. Then the best in Arts - who showed cleanliness in their artworks that may be the next Amorsolo. Then the best in Writing, students who showed cleanliness in their notes. Lastly is the Most Cooperative, who actively cooperates in school activites. Sportsmanship award was given to those who lift the name of ECS in terms of sports like basketball, volleyball, and swimming. lastly is the Loyalty Award, students who make ECS as their foundation since nursery.

Last Awarding ceremony is the Honorable mentions. The most Award that was distributed came from the section Proverbs. Claiming the Fifth to Third Honorable Mentions, First Honorable mention and Valedictorian. Our Class Valedictorian became touchy when he spoke infront of us, he became so emotional when he said that we are going to separate our ways and leave this institution.

Then Pledge of Loyalty saying…”to exemplify the desirable Christian Values, Strengthen family ties, selflessly involve ourselves in helping others, to strive to contribute to national growth and prosperity, as embodied to our commitment to God, to our country, and to our home.”

Last performance was made by sections Psalms and Ecclesiasies entitled “Love Will be Our Home”. This presentation was presented in a different way  - hand miming. Telling that we trully need the love of our parents because without them, we are nothing. Lastly is our Alma Mater Song.

Doxology then Recessional where we graduates of ECS are proud because we are now graduates and we are facing another stepping stone - the College life. But this is different, no one cried!

We are going to miss each of everyone of us. As a remembrance, we give our cellphone numbers to our classmates and keeping in touch in college. Also, we are planning to have a reunion maybe in the middle of college life or after 5 years.

Simply, this batch is the best of all batches from Emmanuel Christian School.

We were both young when I first saw you
I close my eyes
And the flashback starts
I’m standing there
On a balcony in summer air

See the lights
See the party, the ball gowns
I see you make your way through the crowd
And say hello, little did I know

That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles
And my daddy said stay away from Juliet
And I was crying on the staircase
Begging you please don’t go, and I said

Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone
I’ll be waiting all there’s left to do is run
You’ll be the prince and I’ll be the princess
It’s a love story baby just say yes

So I sneak out to the garden to see you
We keep quiet ’cause we’re dead if they knew
So close your eyes
Escape this town for a little while

‘Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter
And my daddy said stay away from Juliet
But you were everything to me
I was begging you please don’t go and I said

Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone
I’ll be waiting all there’s left to do is run
You’ll be the prince and I’ll be the princess
It’s a love story baby just say yes

Romeo save me, they try to tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it’s real
Don’t be afraid, we’ll make it out of this mess
It’s a love story baby just say yes
Oh oh

I got tired of waiting
Wondering if you were ever coming around
My faith in you is fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town, and I said

Romeo save me I’ve been feeling so alone
I keep waiting for you but you never come
Is this in my head? I don’t know what to think
He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring

And said, marry me Juliet
You’ll never have to be alone
I love you and that’s all I really know
I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress
It’s a love story baby just say yes

Oh, oh, oh, oh
‘Cause we were both young when I first saw you

It never crossed my mind at all
That’s what I tell myself
What we had is come and gone
You better offer someone else
It is for the best
I know it is
But I see you

Sometimes I try to hide
What I feel inside
And I turn around
You’re with him now
I just can’t figure it out

Tell me why
You’re so hard to forget
Don’t remind me
I’m not over it
Tell me why
I can’t seem to face the truth
I’m just a little too not over you

Memories suppose to fade
What’s wrong with my heart
Shake it off let it go
Didn’t think it would be this hard
Should be strong, moving on
But I see you

Sometimes I try to hide
What I feel inside
And I turn around
You’re with him now
I just can’t figure it out

Tell me why
You’re so hard to forget
Don’t remind me
I’m not over it
Tell me why
I can’t seem to face the truth
I’m just a little too not over you

Maybe I regret
Everything I said
And there’s no way
To take it all back
Yeah
Now I’m on my own
I wont let you go
I’ll never understand
I’ll never understand
Yeah, ohhh.

Tell me why
You’re so hard to forget
Don’t remind me
I’m not over it
Tell me why
I can’t seem to face the truth
I’m just a little too not over you

Tell me why
You’re so hard to forget
Don’t remind me
I’m not over it
Tell me why
I can’t seem to face the truth
And I really don’t know what to do
I’m just a little too not over you

Not over you, ooh.

Upon my listening to this song, I remember my ex fling boyfriend. I could relate to the whole music video of David Archuleta’s “A Little Too Not Over You”. It’s like telling me that the happy memories that we’ve made and done at my house, at the park and at some dates we’ve done.  I really miss my ex fling boyfriend.

“You’re so hard to forget”. This line makes my heart cry out loud, everytime I see his pictures here at my computer, or even at my mp4, I want all of my days and nights spend with him. All of my hopes and dreams are always him.  Why is he is so hard to forget to me? He is that man I want for myself, even it is so complicated to be as possible. As I am alone in my house, or even with my parents and siblings, i renounce his name again and again, for me this is a ritual that you are calling him from afar just to come near to you (maybe this is true to others).  He is that guy that I am looking for: spending the whole day and night kissing, stopping him from drinking liquor, using cigar, avoiding him to being a shopaholic, would love him, who would accept him as he is, as a whole him (what ever he is). All of that is all fit for me, but why did we lasted for just 15 days or shorter than that? Why he didn’t let me do those things for him, to prove that I am fit for him.

“I can’t seem to face the truth”. Even the truth are all complicated this times, I still believe that one time we will bumped to each other and we will be as boyfriend again, but not in a short period of time.

“Sometimes I try to hide what I feel inside. And I turn around, you’re with him now. I just can’t figure it out”. This is the wrost experience to all people who have experienced break-ups, cool offs, even I, experienced that. It is so painful to the person who saw that kind of scene. You have already him them you are looking for another one, that is so ridiculous? Why, are you not contented with him? Well this is the line that I want to tell to all people who are looking for mroe even they have boyfriends or girlfriends. It is so hard to accept that your girlfriend or your boyfriend, has another not even telling you .

“Memories supposed to fade”. Past is past. We must forget what happend to our past - the bad one. I just can’t understand why now a days, many teens, especially me, can’t let the past things or happenings be put to an end, like a fading in the fog? Is it because that they give pleasure to each other? Is it because that there’re beautiful memories that must not put to an end? or Maybe, must fade because there is more better than the past? My teacher in english told me that we must forget the past happenings in terms of relationships, because in the future there will be something that is more expectations that we should expect.

“Should be strong, moving on”. After that big tragedy in our love life, or in just a plain life that we have, we should move on for a better one. Yes we should be, because if we are still minding the worst things, we are still have the bandages of the past worst happenings in our lives. It’s hard to let the things that made you and your past love life put to a period. Let this past be a part of your experience and an inspiration. For me, He is now an inspiration, but I need him. He is SO HARD TO FORGET!

Thinking Of You Chords by Katy Perry

(verse 1)
comparasons are easily done
once you’ve had a taste of perfection
like an apple handing from a tree
i pick the ripest on i still got the seed

(pre-chorus)
you said move on where do i go
i guess second best is all i will know

(chorus)
cause when im with him i am thinking of you, thinking of you
what you would do if
you were the one who was spending the night
oh i wish that i was looking into your eye

(verse 2)
you’re like an indian summer in the middle of winter
like a hard candy with a surprise center
how do i get better once ive had the best
you said there’s tons of fish in the waters
so the waters i will test

(pre-chorus)
he kissed my lips i taste your mouth
he pulled me in, i was discussed with myself

(chorus)
cause when im with him i am thinking of you, thinking of you
what you would do if
you were the one who was spending the night
oh i wish that i was looking into your….

(bridge)
the best and oh i do regret
how could i let myself let you go
and now, now the lessons learned
i touched and i was burned
oh i think you should know

(chorus)
cause when im with him i am thinking of you, thinking of you
what you would do if
you were the one who was spending the night
oh i wish that i was looking into your eye, your eyes, your eye
wont you walk through and
bust down the door and take me away no more mistakes
cause in your eyes i’d like to stay

Listen to the song of Katy Perry - Thinking of You. This song trully gave me an inspiration to write again here. Why did I said that? Because the meaning of this song is telling me something in my past, especially to my ex-boyfriends. The apple that hangs in the tree and someone get the seeds, meaning that the person is the apple and the word “someone gets”, is the person who will took the person into perfection and the “seeds” is the characteristics that never lasts - which is LOVE.

“You we’re the one who was spending the night”, tells the listener that they are not alone in the night because there is someone who guides them, who protects them, and who loves them so much.

I remember the scene of my friend, who is a girl, whith her boyfriend in their (the girl’s) garage. I saw them sitting so closely, I can’t tell if this is true, kissing each other. My eyes got big when I saw them. I remember in my past the things that I and my ex-boyfriend done last semestral break. I still remember what we’d done that night. I want to cry to this song because the music video of this song is a solder who has a wife, or should I say his fiance, leave for an action in a battle. In the end, his lover received a telegram that her man was shot in an action and died. She is preparing for the mourning ceremony for her man. It was shown in the music video their most memorable memories in the past. All of their days and nights, they spent it alone - with smiles in their faces, comfort, guidance.

 ”Cause in your eyes I’d like to stay”. If i will say this to my love, I will do it with some touchy feeling or I will cry, because i don’t want my love to be gone for good, I want my love to be with me everyday of my life. I can picture what should happend when i say this. I want to stop the rotationg of the earth so that we’re together forever, holding each other’s hand. then I kissed my love so tenderly and likes ther’s no more tomorrow.

I am hoping that my love and I will be back again. Because that person really taught me on how to love the real. And I want that person to be with me forever until my eyes got closed.

I

Before when I saw you at the corner,

I felt that you’re really alone

So I came at your side and ask what’s wrong

You said nothing, nothing at all

So I go and I let you there

II

I don’t even realized that the

Person I’ve ever talked is new

So I came again and make friends

At that person

That person accepted my hand

As a friend

A friend that would be at his

Side forever as bests

As a friend that would help that

Person in any problems

III

It is almost everybody that I

Saw that person at my side.

It is like my brethren that

Would never leave that person

 Brethren

It is somewhere that would

Protect you in any cases of life.

It is likewise that a pencil

Would be sharpening in a sharpener.

It is more than I feel for this

Person, - more than a brethren

IV

If it is more than brethren, then

It would be love.

So I secretly hide my feelings to

That person that I accepted as

My brethren.

That person doesn’t even realized that

The person accepted that person as that

Person’s brethren, has a true feelings

At that person.

No body should tell what’s love?

Love is blind and a battlefield,

And a warrior conquers a land!

V

Secretly, that persons always never

Parted. No fought, no selfishness.

That persons brother don’t know why

That person love that person

It’s just erupted at that person

Heart.

A heart who has an amorous one kind of love

It would be a mirthful one to have

That person in life

VI

Esteem may not just that kind of love

Devotions on a person you love or

The passion that we want to desire

Love is what a person need in life

Love is what each of us been wanting for

Wanting that love would last till death.

Till death do thy parthend?

VII

One-day dream said that who would love

A person like me?

A person who would take care for thy me?

A person who would cherish my life

Forever?

A person who understands the real

Myself as I?

A person who would mirthfully my life

Foreverlasting?

VIII

No body should hypothesized my real

Situation in present times

I’d even not know why should I love

The same one?

Isn’t because that the one is the most flinty

Person that I’ve ever meant to saw in

My life.

Isn’t that person is the one who is boast

In life, not in books but in real life

That person would enmity my self as

A whole

IX

Morning sunshine came, I’ve saw my

Amorous but brainful creature

I’d though that would just still

At my side for a moment

But it wouldn’t happen even just

A glimpsed of his face

I’d always face at him but not

Was happened

I’d never know that the person that

I’ve captured in a piece of paper

Was a person with a huge joke.

X

Then on that cold day, I’d saw the

Person that my brother loved before

Yea, known faced, known attitude,

And known creature

A gorgeous face was I’ve seen.

It’s ok for me but that person

Changed a lot?

That person is a sophisticated?

XI

In a dusk dark night, somebody

Answers the desk phone

It was true; I’m vacorous in mind,

Departed, and ashamed?

I don’t know why I’m like that?

But no one knows why shouldn’t

Deserved this title

XII

“Can we just parth away and just

Not to talk each one of us,

“Cause I’d think of it, not that

I’d wanted we parthen apart.”

Tears fall from my chin, “isn’t that

We should not to communicate.”

“Maybe answer is yes maybe not!”

Maybe I’d deserved to be rejectable

Person who would just

Thrown away from ones heart

Should I move to? Or not?

I

I always knelt down and cry

Why am I crying?

Isn’t am I just acting, playing, joking,

Or I’m depressed

Yea I’m depressed for nobody

Loves me

No one likes to love me

But I think they liked too

But not today for sure

Maybe in the future

II

I always seeing from my left

And my right, fronts and backs

The couples and relationships

Which normally a creature would do.

Even in telecommunications, people

Are now engaged

But who am I, do I need to

Be engaged? Do I need to?

Who would it be?  Would it be you or

Someone else?

III

But my heart says loudly that

He chose you

Cause my heart believes that

You will take its cared of

I’ve fallen to anybody here on

Earth but I’m busted as always

I’ve tried all of I know to

Fall in love that nothing still busted

I’ve used so many names to hide

My real identity but still busted

IV

I’m here on earth to be loved

And be a lover to you as of course

I’m here for shall I protect and

Be protected by your love

I’m here for I want to be your

Lover and your pea

For a lover knows most what a

Love is

For a pea, little things make

Big difference

V

I want you cause you chose me

For you deserve to hold my heart

I want you cause my forlorned

Heart needs excultion

I want cause I’m alone and

Depressed, frigid, what’s frigid?

I want you cause I believe that

You can complete my life

I want you cause I love you

Even when there’s a third party

VI

Red lips makes my day mirthful

For this means I do care

Blue eyes makes my day imaginative

For this means I do want to live with you

White walls makes my day innocent

For this says shh!!! Babe, hug me!!!

Pink cheeks makes my day blushy

For this says I saw my love

Black roses makes my day alive

For it congratulates me that means

I love you very much

VII

When I’m down I needed

A hand to hold

When I’m sad I needed

A shoulder to cry on

When I’m happy I needed

A warm hug

When I’m sincere I needed

Serious hugs and feelings

When I’m alone I needed

A person who would love me -

And it was you

VIII

I almost kill my self for

All of my crushes who busted me

I want my life put to an end

When my heart broked out

I want my life be happy as

Music of harp softly plays

Kill my self would deter me to

Reach my future goals

But you’ve come, you’ve stop my

Plan to kill my self

IX

Hug me for I’m alone

Alone means no one cares

Talk to me for I’m depressed

Depressed as a lonely sailor in a lonely sea

Hold my hand for I don’t want

To be far from you

Love me for all of you know

Love as true person

Kiss me for this will make my days

Change cause my love kissed me

X

How can I love you

Maybe like this

How can I care for you

Maybe like that

How can I cherish you

Maybe like those

How can you love I

How can you care for I

How can you cherish my life

If without me

XI

But now I know how to love

A simple kind of you

Yeah loving you is the hardest one

But if you take it carefully

It may last forevermore

But what if love takes easy

It looks like a play form a theater

So am I the one? and

Are you the one for me?